Late-Term Abortion: Voices from Life’s Helpline
What women share on our helpline highlights why compassionate, non-judgemental support is so needed.
Trigger Warning: This post references later-term abortion and emotional distress
Your support helps ensure that when someone is ready to speak, there is someone there to listen.
Late-term abortions are experiences that are rarely spoken about. Not because they don’t happen, but because they are incredibly difficult to put into words. For those who contact Life’s Helpline, their experience is something they have carried alone, sometimes for years.
They don’t know how to voice it. They don’t know how it will be received. And so, when they do reach out, it has already taken a huge amount of courage.
“You’re going to hate me.”
These conversations often begin with the same words:
“You’re going to hate me.”
Words that are often followed by a long silence while the woman tries to find the words for something she’s held for so long. Something she never thought she would say out loud.
“I had an abortion at 23 weeks”
Many describe carrying deep feelings of grief, regret, and shame about the loss of their child.
They may have buried their experience, only to have it resurface unexpectedly years later. Others struggle from day one, constantly replaying it, questioning it, trying to make sense of it on their own.
A Worse Fear
Sitting alongside their trauma is a worse fear: ‘how will others react when they know what I have done?’ – making it almost impossible to speak out.
Some have never told anyone. Others have only shared part of their story.
What they often need in those first moments is simple: a safe space where they can cry, vent, and talk openly and freely for as long as they need.
Facing Pressure and Uncertainty
Some stories describe pressure within relationships – a partner changing their mind, threats to leave, or situations at home becoming difficult or unsafe.
“He’s going to leave me if I don’t.”
Helpline Client
They may speak about how quickly everything seemed to happen – going from what felt like a “perfect pregnancy” to receiving unexpected news, facing complex circumstances, and feeling rushed, sometimes pushed, in one direction.
A Common Thread
The common thread running through many of these experiences is a deep sense of fear, confusion, and isolation.
These are not easy experiences to describe, and they are often not spoken about, leaving the woman to carry the weight of it alone.
The Ongoing Emotional Impact
One of the most consistent things we hear is that the emotional impact often endures. Some women contact us shortly afterwards, trying to process what has happened. Others reach out months, years – even decades- later.
The emotions they describe include anger, regret, confusion and a sense of loss and grief that they feel they have no right to.
“I thought I’d be ok…but I’m not…I’m really not.”
Helpline Client
For some, these feelings come and go over time – but can be crushing when they resurface. Certain moments, like a subsequent pregnancy, a friend’s growing family, or stories in the media, can bring the memories and emotions rushing back.
Commonly shared is how alone many feel in this. Others around them have moved on, while they can feel stuck, struggling to find a way forward.
The journey to acceptance isn’t straightforward. It rarely follows a linear path.
No One Should Face This Alone
At Life’s Helpline, we recognise that each person’s experience is different.
We do not make assumptions.
We do not direct the conversation.
Instead, we listen.
We offer time and space for the woman to talk through her experience in her words – at a pace that feels manageable.
For one woman that may mean speaking out for the first time about a buried memory.
For others, it may mean returning to something they have carried for many years.
Wherever someone is in that process, they do not have to go through it alone.
“Thank you, I feel like a weight has been lifted.”
Helpline Client
We can only continue supporting women in their unexpected pregnancy journeys with your help. If you can spare anything at all, women, children and future generations all over the UK will benefit from your generosity today.
Finding Support
Reaching out can feel difficult, especially when something is so difficult to put into words or when it has been held silently for so long.
Life’s free National Helpline is fully accredited, non-directive, and client-led.
This means each person is supported to talk about what matters to them, in their own words.
With your support, we can be there for more people facing these situations.
You can help by:
• Becoming a monthly donor
• Making a one-off donation
• Raising awareness by sharing this blog
• Fundraising in your community
Your support helps ensure that no one has to carry these experiences alone.
And if this reflects something of your own experience,
or if you would like someone to talk to, we are here to listen.
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